The Only Way Home (Draft)
Brandie Trent
The only way home these days
is through clicks --
through Google Maps
and YouTube
On Memorial Day,
there is but one grave to visit.
I can see it on the Internet
when I zoom in over my dead end home town
or use satellite images on findagrave.com
This is the way back home.
and all that there is
is an article in a scrapbook
about the time the tractor topples on two boys cousins
and how their baskets spilled our fresh-picked berries
purple
blue
and now my middle son looks just like him
his buzzcut blond
his narrow features of the grave
and if I had known the resemblance,
I would have named him Donald
but there are no more babies to name
and no more road home
no more sugar maples
nothing but a big, hollow heartache
The doors are locked to my father's house
and the secrets are in boxes under beds
slipped under slender-folded camisoles
and the photos are unframed and filed neatly
labeled on the back
so we will remember to forget the stories we have not passed on
so we will have something to tell the children what we haven't told ourselves
so we can get back to the history of home
by picking up the black and white breadcrumbs
is through clicks --
through Google Maps
and YouTube
On Memorial Day,
there is but one grave to visit.
I can see it on the Internet
when I zoom in over my dead end home town
or use satellite images on findagrave.com
This is the way back home.
and all that there is
is an article in a scrapbook
about the time the tractor topples on two boys cousins
and how their baskets spilled our fresh-picked berries
purple
blue
and now my middle son looks just like him
his buzzcut blond
his narrow features of the grave
and if I had known the resemblance,
I would have named him Donald
but there are no more babies to name
and no more road home
no more sugar maples
nothing but a big, hollow heartache
The doors are locked to my father's house
and the secrets are in boxes under beds
slipped under slender-folded camisoles
and the photos are unframed and filed neatly
labeled on the back
so we will remember to forget the stories we have not passed on
so we will have something to tell the children what we haven't told ourselves
so we can get back to the history of home
by picking up the black and white breadcrumbs